Find another couple with kids with whom you can switch baby sitting the kids for every other week. That way you can have one week of free babysitting in return for babysitting for free for the other week.

That's a great idea! Someone should create an app that can facilitate this.

I think it is fine to find some things that you can do at home (e.g., games, conversation, dessert, etc.), but as often as you can, it is important to get out of the house together. Sometimes a change in scenery can do a lot for a couple, especially if it happens on a regular basis.

You need to start with where you are in the relationship. What I mean by that is don’t have deeply personal conversations if your relationship is not yet deeply meaningful. Don’t share things all at once and too much too soon. You have to take a measured approach. One way to start is to talk about things at a factual level (“my parents divorced”) and move more deeply into your opinions (“All of my siblings handled the divorce differently”) and emotions (“my parent’s divorce was the most difficult time in my life…”). Dr. John Van Epp uses this approach, which he calls OPEN (Observation and facts, Perspectives and opinions, Experiences and emotions, Needs and relationship responses; for more on this, see his book How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk), and it can be really helpful.

Even though you are being careful to not share too much too soon, there may still be times when some conversations are awkward. At that point you may just have to go for it. Some conversations don't get easier until you start talking about them.

Regards to talking about sexual intimacy: The reality is, for most single people, talking about sexual intimacy with someone whom they are sexually attracted to is going to provoke more sexual feelings (and make it more difficult to maintain sexual boundaries). There is wisdom in refraining from these conversations until your relationship is sufficiently matured (and for some conversations on this topic, it may just be best to wait until marriage). I recommend following the counsel given in the For Strength of Youth (see the section on Sexual Purity on lds.org) in making decisions on what you should talk about pertaining to sexual intimacy.

There are two parts here: the blaming of others and the blaming of self. First, if others are literally blaming you for EVERYTHING, they probably have some issues. Chances are, they don’t blame you for everything but do blame you for more than you would like. The first thing I would recommend is to see if you can identify any truths related to their accusations. If there is, make steps to improve yourself. After you’ve done that, move on with your life and stop worrying about their blame (blaming others is one of just many ways that people shrink from personal responsibility).

For the self blame: Follow the same path. Identify honestly things you could do better, work to improve them, then let it go. Holding on to it won’t be helpful.

You may also read the Common Cold of Marriage #3 article and study the boxes. Whatever you do, stay out of the wrong boxes!

Honestly, I wouldn’t worry about it. I would catch myself when I started dwelling on it and would certainly never act out in frustration or anger. The fact that you feel a little rift is because you feel threatened. That’s normal. Try to stop worrying about things you can’t control (you can’t control whether or not a particular girl will choose you) and focus on what you can: be kind, improve your attractiveness, act lovingly to your neighbor (even if you like the same girl).

That stinks man. My recommendation would be to find a girl you trust (and trust will tell you the truth) and ask her what she thinks you could do to improve your approach, appearance, demeanor, etc.
For the record: girls who "ghost out" and "just fade away" are often acting like cowards. It would be better for them to directly (and kindly) tell you that they are not interested. They often think that this is the kind approach, but it's not.

A few things. First, you obviously have an approachable persona about you, and I wouldn’t change that. That is a good thing. It means that you are, like you said, friendly, sociable, and kind.

Second, don’t be too quick to judge. Someone who may appear “off” early in a dating situation may be very much “on.” If there is ZERO physical attraction that is one thing, but if someone is less attractive or appears to be “looking for trouble”, there may be some wisdom is reserving judgement. Early in a relationship, what we believe about someone is made up more from our own stereotypes and perceptions than what they actually say or do. So reserve judgement and give some of these guys a second chance.

Lastly, (and now I am just guessing on what was supposed to follow “Should I…”) it’s okay to ask a guy out, you just have to be thoughtful about it. Here is the principle: it’s a good thing to send the subtle message to a guy that you are interested. This can help facilitate feelings that he could have for you. But you don’t want to appear desperately interested. You might try causally suggesting that “Hey, we should go ______. Do you want to do that next week?” If you’ve done that, you have sent the message that you are at least interested in getting to know him. Afterwards, I would scale back your forward-ness so as not to be perceived as desperate. There is more I could say on this, but I will probably just have to put it all together in a blog post :)

I think this an INCREDIBLY COMMON issue sadly. I'm the same. I haven't received anything different at BYU-Idaho. I think our generation is looking for instant gratification rather than a true relationship. My plan is to move back to Utah after I graduate where the men are actual gentlemen. I also think I'm a good catch. When I lived in Salt Lake or Provo I had 2-3 dates a week when I put myself out there. I had a few relationships that just didn't work out but they weren't bad. I've been here a year and I've been asked on a date 3 times. Once was a set up and once was loud and awkward while I was trying to study in the library.

It's okay for girls to ask guys out, but there is some caution with it (see above). I would start by initiating conversations with him. Orchestrate situations where you can be around him and talk with him a little bit. After that, find out something he likes to do and then ask him if he wants to go do it. Afterwards, lay off a bit and see if he reciprocates any interest. That's just one approach to take.

Welcome to Rexburg! I hope you've enjoyed your first semester up here. Yes, you should go on dates. Take girls out not for the purpose of finding one to marry, but for the many other purposes of dating: learn about self and others, have fun, to treat women the way they should be treated, etc. I wouldn't worry about saying anything about not wanting to be romantic at this time. Just enjoy the dates and be kind and respectful. There are a lot of woman who would love to be treated like a queen for a couple hours on the weekend.

The same topic is covered in each classroom on a particular week. For example, each class will be covering the same topic next week. Hopefully that helps!

First of all, you are not alone with the "dating turned into a nightmare" with your online experience. Unfortunately this is more common than people realize. Here are just a few things to consider:
-Go back to establishing your self-worth based on what God thinks about you rather than what guys think about you. A great talk for that can be found here: https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/10/approaching-the-throne-of-god-with-confidence?lang=eng
-Don't define yourself by what you've done. Your mistakes don't define you and thinking they do will kill your confidence. If you lack confidence, the pull to seek acceptance in inappropriate ways will likely intensify. Again, the talk referenced above can help.
-You will also want to re-establish your relationship boundaries. Commit to a path of minimal touch before marriage. Be open about those boundaries and refuse to give in to the "I am a hypocrite for saying these are my boundaries because I've broke them in the past."

You are right that there is no easy answer, I just hope you stop beating yourself up. You've made mistakes, but they cannot define who you really are.

Yes, patterns do start somewhere. In short, be where you ought to be (physically and psychologically) when you ought to be there. If you are on a date, put your device away. If you are trying to have a conversations, put your device away. At church, please control yourself. If you are in class, put it way. If you need to call your mom, by all means take it out and call your mom. Texting your girlfriend? Do it, as long as you are no supposed to be present somewhere else.
So, just be where you ought to be when you ought to be there.

No worries! The answer to your first question depends on the mental health and the people involved, so I won't go into that. How to talk about it? Don't divulge too much too soon. Also, as your relationship progresses, be open enough with your partner to help them have realistic expectations about you. There may be times when you can't be as present with your partner because you are in a low-spot.
There is a lot more that could be said, but I agree that awareness and understanding can help smooth out some concerns. However, you also don't want to overshare too much too soon.

There are so many different things that are important. I've tired to highlight some of those things on this blog. Here are some of those things: intentional decision-making, goals, understanding, the presence of any number of Christ-like attributes, etc.
Communication is important, but it is not more important than the choices we make and the character we develop.

Thanks for asking a great question! I don’t think there are really any easy answers to this, but here is a place to start: stop making emotionally (or comfort)-based decisions. Sometimes when we fear we are losing independence, it triggers uncomfortable emotional feelings. These might manifest themselves in feeling annoyed, controlled, etc. However, if we take a step back and examine the person we are dating, find them to be a kind, attractive, and good person, then we probably need to push back on our discomfort a little bit. What does that look like?
First, push ourselves to spend time with our significant other when we don’t initially feel like it. We don’t need to do this all the time, but doing so on occasion can help.
Next, let your boyfriend know that if you come across as distant that it is because you are working through your own stuff and it doesn’t have anything to do with him. Maybe you explain to him that there are simply times when you need some space (there is nothing wrong with this).
Lastly, realize that you are normal. A lot of people feel this way. The way to push through this is to make more rational choices and less emotional ones.
Hope that helps a little bit.

I think the inclination that many people feel to engage in "too much touch" comes from a natural and good desire to connect with other humans in a physical way. It's not bad to desire physical connection and closeness, it just needs to be balanced with one's value system and appropriate relationship development. When physical touch begins to dominate a premarital relationship it tends to cloud our judgment in mate selection. We become more inclined to focus on outward appearance rather than one's character. Unfortunately, because people often focus on how they feel in the moment, we often fail to carefully consider how our present actions will impact our future. Therefore, many people pursue what feels good in the "here and now."